If You Don't Root For The Dodgers,

Managing Is Like Holding A Dove In Your Hand. Squeeze Too Hard And You Kill It; Not Hard Enough And It Flies Away.

Bruce Benedict Is So Slow He'd Finish Third In A Race With A Pregnant Woman.

The Gym Teacher's Name Was Mr. Caruso. Mr. Caruso Did Not Speak English. He Spoke 'gym.' One Day I Was Playing Basketball And Mr. Caruso Told Me I Would Have To Get An Athletic Supporter. He Didn't Express Himself Exactly That Way, Though. He Said, 'hey, You, One Day You're Gonna Go Up For A Rebound And The Family Jewels Aren't Gonna Go With Ya.' I Had No Idea What He Was Talking About. Next Day I Showed Up For Practice Without My Watch And My Mezuzah. He Said, 'did Ya Take Care Of The Family Jewels?' I Said, 'i Left 'em In My Locker.' Took Us A Half Hour To Revive Mr. Caruso.

I Am So Happy And Proud To Learn Of Hideo Nomo's Election To The Japanese Baseball Hall Of Fame. He Was Quite A Pitcher And Competitor, But He Is Also A Very Special And Caring Person.

If You Don't Love The Dodgers, There's A Good Chance You May Not Get Into Heaven.