If You Call Your Opponent A Politician,

I Can't Think Of A Performer Who Is Better On Television Than In Person.

You Know When Jerry Ford Gets The Best Joke, You Know You're In Trouble.

Believe Me When I Say That Bill Clinton's Second Term Will Be Good For Business. My Business.

I'm Not Trying To Write A Bleak And Blistering Screed Against American Civilization. I'm Writing Something That I Hope Is Fun And Satirical And Full Of Possibility.

If The Audience Doesn't Like It, Usually They're Just Silent. But They've Never All Walked Out At Once.