If I Had My Life To Live

I Didn't Say The Meat Was Tough. I Said I Didn't See The Horse That Is Usually Outside.

Never Try To Impress A Woman, Because If You Do She'll Expect You To Keep Up The Standard For The Rest Of Your Life.

I Have Been Advised By The Best Medical Authority, At My Age, Not To Attempt To Give Up Alcohol.

No Man Is Boss In His Own Home, But He Can Make Up For It, He Thinks, By Making A Dog Play Dead.

I Seldom Took A Drink On The Set Before 9 A.m.