If At First You Do Succeed Don't

Never Tell The Box-office Man That You Can't Hear Well Or He Will Sell You A Seat Where You Can't See Either.

If There's Any Literary Ability In A Feller, Getting Fired Out Of A Good Government Job Will Bring It Out.

The Only Time Some Fellows Are Seen With Their Wives Is After They're Indicted.

Fun Is Like Life Insurance; The Older You Get, The More It Costs.

Executive: A Man Who Makes Quick Decisions And Is Sometimes Right.