I Wish I Was This Dark Genius

I Quit Drinking, And I Figure If I Go To Ten Yankee Games This Year Without Drinking I'll Save $32,000.

Don't Do Drugs To Be Cool, Do 'em Because You Hate Yourself.

I Like Gambling On Stuff That You Don't Know Anything About. That's When It's Exciting.

I'm Very Resilient. The Only Thing I'm Missing Right Now Are Abs.

I Was At Yankee Stadium One Time At 5 A.m., But That Was To Buy Angel Dust