I Wish I Was This Dark Genius

And Now It Looks Like I'm Probably Going To Shoot A Movie That I Wrote. I Got The Money To Do It, And I Would Star And All, Because Of Being On Howard.

My Mother Would Say, Before I Left The House, 'remember Art, Hugs Are Better Than Drugs.' And I Believed My Mother, I Believed Everything She Said - Until The First Time I Got High At A Party. I Leaned Back, And I Went, 'god, This Is Way Better Than When My Uncle Perry Hugs Me. What Else Has My Mother Been Lying To Me About?

When I Black Out, It's The Happiest Time Of My Life.

I Wish I Was This Dark Genius Artist - Like Richard Pryor Or Something.

A-rod Wants To Be Like Babe Ruth. And People Don't Realize This, He's A Lot Like Babe Ruth. Before The Playoffs A Couple Of Years Ago, A-rod Went To The Hospital And Promised A Dying Kid He'd Ground Out To Second For Him.