I Was So Drunk Last Night I

If You Drink Don't Drive. Don't Even Putt.

Return To Me, For My Heart Wants You Only. Hurry Home, Hurry Home, Won't You Please Hurry Home To My Heart.

Johnny Carson Is A Comedian Who Is Seen Every Night In Millions Of Bedrooms All Over America...and That's Why His Last Wife Left Him.

The Whole World Is Drunk And We're Just The Cocktail Of The Moment. Someday Soon, The World Will Wake Up, Down Two Aspirin With A Glass Of Tomato Juice, And Wonder What The Hell All The Fuss Was About.

There's A Statue Of Jimmy Stewart In The Hollywood Wax Museum, And The Statue Talks Better Than He Does.