I Took My Girl To Dinner, And

I Feel Responsible For Johnny Ray's Success. See Many Years Ago I Asked Him To Be On My Show And He Asked For A Lot Of Money And I Cried. And He Stole That From Me.

A Scout Troop Consists Of Twelve Little Kids Dressed Like Schmucks Following A Big Schmuck Dressed Like A Kid.

I'm Happy To Be Making My First Appearance On Air Professionally. By That I Mean I'm Finally Getting Paid, Which I Know Will Be A Great Relief To My Creditors.

The Doctors Couldn't Find Anything Wrong With Me Except That I Have A Slight Stomach Pain. Wait Till I Get My Hospital Bill! Then I'll Really Have A Pain The Stomach!

Age Is Something That Doesn't Matter, Unless You Are A Cheese. Age Is Strictly A Case Of Mind Over Matter. If You Don't Mind, It Doesn't Matter.