I Think That You're Always Going To

Today, John Kerry Announced A Fool-proof Plan To Wipe Out The $500b Deficit. John Kerry Has A Plan, He's Going To Put It On His Wife's Gold Card.

In Louisiana, President Bush Met With Over 15,000 National Guard Troops. Here's The Weird Part, Nobody Remembers Seeing Him There.

Singer Boy Dylan Was Stopped At His Own Sow By Security Guards Who Failed To Recognize The Singer. Asked To Comment, Dylan Replied, 'i Can Hardly Blame Them. Look At Me.'

The Big Political News, Arnold Schwarzenegger Announced He's Running For Governor Of California, And Already, People Are Chanting, 'four More Vowels, Four More Vowels.

Lot Of People Wondering If John Kerry Supports Gay Marriages. Here's A Hint ... He Gets $1,000 Haircuts.