I Still Have Drive, But Everything Is

I Don't Feel An Obligation To Give Everyone A Hard Time, But When They're Important People, It's Fun.

Alan King, A Comedian I Adored, Was Considered Society, And I Was Considered The Jewish Kid From The Neighborhood.

Famous People Are Deceptive. Deep Down, They're Just Regular People. Like Larry King. We've Been Friends For Forty Years. He's One Of The Few Guys I Know Who's Really Famous. One Minute He's Talking To The President On His Cell Phone, And Then The Next Minute He's Saying To Me, Do You Think We Ought To Give The Waiter Another Dollar?

I Was Sitting In The Toilet And I Was By Myself. I Was Tired Of Playing With The Roller, So I Said I'd Better Write A Book.

I Have No Idea What I'm Going To Say When I Stand Up To Give A Toast. But I Do Know That Anything I Say I Find Funny.