I Saw A Transvestite Wearing A T-shirt

Stand Up Is Really Fun Because If I Think Of A Joke Or A Funny Idea, Then I Can Just Go And Tell Some People And If They Laugh, They Laugh Right Away.

I Think, At First Blush, The '60s Always Enticed Me. There's Something About The '60s, It's Not Hard To Like It.

I Want To Launch A Globe Into Space Just To Mess With The Astronauts.

When I Stub My Toe It's Like I Pressed A Button That Plays All The Curse Words I Know.

I Am Sometimes Referred To As Excuse Me In An Annoyed Tone Of Voice, Because Apparently I Am In The Way. I Am So Sorry. I Am Supposed To Be Some Sort Of Mind Reader, I Guess. I Am Moving Out Of The Way Now As Slowly As I Possibly Can. I Am Doing This And There's Nothing You Can Do About It.