I Saw A Human Pyramid Once. It

All These Jokes Have Been Pre-approved As Funny By Me.

I Went To The Home Depot, Which Was Unnecessary. I Need To Go To The Apartment Depot. Which Is Just A Big Warehouse With A Whole Lot Of People Standing Around Saying "we Don't Have To Fix Anything."

Spaghetti... I Can't Eat Spaghetti, There's Too Many Of Them. No Matter How Hungry I Am, 1,000 Of Something Is Too Many. I'll Have 1,000 Pieces Of Noodles.

I Wish My Name Was Brian Because Maybe Sometimes People Would Misspell My Name And Call Me Brain. That's Like A Free Compliment And You Don't Even Gotta Be Smart To Notice It.

I Got A King-sized Bed. I Don't Know Any Kings, But If One Came Over, I Guess He'd Be Comfortable.