I Quit Drinking, And I Figure If

I Once Dealt With A Prima Donna On A Movie Set. I Won't Say Who, But His First Name Is A Country. A Communist Country. Run By Fidel Castro.

I Was Always A Thin Kid; I Was An Athlete.

I Have A Bad Gambling Problem. You're Not In Show Business For 12 Years And Dress Like This Without A Bad Gambling Problem.

Comedians, We're Just People Who Whine. But We Happen To Be Funny When We Whine.

Richard Lewis Has This Incredible Ability To Look Like He's Just... You Know It's An Act That's Been Honed. What You Have To Do In Standup Is Create Spontaneity, Somehow; Even Though You've Done This Act A Million Times, You Gotta Look Like You're Almost Just Thinking Of It Now, To Make It Entertainer.