I Owe A Lot To My Teachers

Humour In Its Highest Reach Mingles With Pathos: It Voices Sorrow For Our Human Lot And Reconciliation With It.

How Strange It Is, Our Little Procession Of Life! The Child Says, "when I Am A Big Boy." But What Is That? The Big Boy Says, "when I Grow Up." And Then, Grown Up, He Says, "when I Get Married." But To Be Married, What Is That After All? The Thought Changes To "when I'm Able To Retire." And Then, When Retirement Comes, He Looks Back Over The Landscape Traversed; A Cold Wind Seems To Sweep Over It; Somehow He Has Missed It All, And It Is Gone.

In Point Of Morals, The Average Woman Is, Even For Business, Too Crooked.

We Think Of The Noble Object For Which The Professor Appears Tonight, We May Be Assured That The Lord Will Forgive Any One Who Will Laugh At The Professor.

In Ancient Times They Had No Statistics So They Had To Fall Back On Lies.