I Once Asked My Father For A

Fatherhood Is Asking Your Son To Make Up A Name Rather Than Tell Anybody Who He Is.

My Father Would Pass Gas And Then Blame It On Imaginary Animals.

When You're A Father You Censor Yourself. You Get Just As Angry With A Child But You Don't Want To Say, "what The Filth And Foul And I'll Filth And Foul, Filth And Foul And, Yeah, Ya Filth And Foul Face, And I'll Filth And Foul, Foul, Filth!" You Don't Want To Say That To A Child So You Censor Yourself And You Sound Like An Idiot: "what The... Get Your... I'll Put A... Get Out Of My Face!"

When You Introduce Competition Into The Public School System, Most Studies Show That Schools Start To Do Better When They Are Competing For Students.

A Father Has To Do Everything In His Power To Keep A Tight Ship, Even Though He Knows The Crew Would Like To Send Him Away In A Dinghy.