I Never Voted For Anybody. I Always

Wouldn't It Be Terrible If I Quoted Some Reliable Statistics Which Prove That More People Are Driven Insane Through Religious Hysteria Than By Drinking Alcohol.

There Are Only Two Real Ways To Get Ahead Today - Sell Liquor Or Drink It.

The Laziest Man I Ever Met Put Popcorn In His Pancakes So They Would Turn Over By Themselves.

All The Men In My Family Were Bearded, And Most Of The Women.

My Illness Is Due To My Doctor's Insistence That I Drink Milk, A Whitish Fluid They Force Down Helpless Babies.