I Live Way Below My Means.

I'm An Independent, But I Got To Admit I Lean Democratic.

Only Married People Understand You Can Be Miserable And Happy At The Same Time.

There Are People Who Would Like To Get Rid Of Minimum Wage. But We Have To Have It, Because If We Didn't Some People Would Not Get Paid Money. They Would Work All Week For Two Loaves Of Bread And Some Spam.

I Took My Alds Test. You Start Reflecting... You Start Thinking About Every Nasty, Skank-ass... It's Like The Movie Scrooge, And The Ghost Of Pussy Past Comes.

Comedians Are The One Who Have To Tell The Emperor He Has No Clothes On.