I Have No Desire To Carry A

Accentuaute The Positives - Medicate The Negatives.

Begin Your Story With A Sentence That Will Immediately Grab Hold Of Your Listener's Ears Like A Surly Nun In A Catholic School.

I Did Shoplift But I Didn't Get In Trouble For It. I Shoplifted A Lot When I Was Little. Candy. I Would Steal Candy.

I Like To Play Unattractive People Who Think They're Pretty. You Can Do What You Want, But I Prefer To Look Interesting.

People Always Think I'm Amy Poehler, Which Never Bothers Me. I Mean, Amy Poehler Is Great.