I Had A Very Close Relationship With

I Wanted To Get From 4th Street To 8th... Then I Remembered Einstein Postulating That Parallel Lines Eventually Meet. They're Dredging My Car From Lake Michigan As We Speak.

My Sister Married A German. He Complained He Couldn't Get A Good Bagel Back Home. I Said: 'well, Whose Fault Is That?'

I Went Into The Gas Station, Said, Fill 'er Up, Harry. The Guy Said, Regular? I Said, No, Put On A Gorrila Suit And Dance Like A Fairy.

When I Was A Kid, My Favourite Time Of The Year When I Was Child Was That Magical First Snowfall. I'd Yell Yippee! Snow! And Run Up To The Front Door And Shout You Know The Deal... You Have To Let Me In Now.

Probably The Worst Time In A Person's Life Is When They Have To Kill A Family Member Because They Are The Devil. But Otherwise It's Been A Pretty Good Day.