I Go Around The Country And Do

If Only Africa Had More Mosquito Nets Then Every Year We Could Save Millions Of Mosquitoes From Dying Needlessly Of Aids.

I Think They Got It Wrong With Saddam Hussein. They Thought He Had The A-bomb. Instead He Had A Bomb.

I Think The Idea That Death Is Not The End, That Your Dog's Just Gone To Live On The Farm, Is Limiting. Thoughts Like That Prevent You From Making The Most Of The Time That You Have.

All Comedians Are A Bit Attention-seeking And I'm No Different. Anyone With The Audacity To Want To Be Listened To For An Hour And A Half Must Be.

I Like To Write A Joke Without Any Fat On It.the Shorter The Better. I Cater For People With Add, Basically.