I Drew The Duck Blue Because I've

Of Course, I Peed My Pants, Everyone My Age Pees Their Pants. It's The Coolest.

I Think The Reason I Don't Read Is Because, When I'm Reading, I Feel Like I'm Missing Out On Something Else. You Know, What Are My Friends Doing? Where's My Girlfriend?

I Wasn't A Kid Growing Up Thinking, 'one Day I'll Get An Oscar And Make A Speech.' That Wasn't On My Mind.

I Choose To Ignore Hell In My Life. When I Was A Little Kid I Asked My Dad "am I Going To Go To Hell?" Because I'd Heard About Hell. And He Said, "nothing You're Gonna Do Will Get You Into Hell." And So I Got To Ignore It.

I'm Not Great At Bedtime Stories. Bedtime Stories Are Supposed To Put The Kid To Sleep. My Kid Gets Riled Up And Then My Wife Has To Come In And Go, 'all Right! Get Out Of The Room.'