I Don't Mind Aging, I Just Don't

I Think It's Time They Knew The Truth About Beethoven.

I've Always Hate Child Stars, Starting From Way Back When, When I Was A Child. The First Child Star I Saw Was Shirley Temple. She Was Six Years Old, Two Foot Six And The Biggest Star In Hollywood. She Wore Ribbons In Her Hair, And Frilly Little Pinafores And Shiny Patent-leather Tap Shoes - Just Like The Boys In Glee Do.

Valentine's Day Is Different For Old People. At This Age I Receive Chocolates In Boxes Shaped Like Artificial Hearts.

All Babies Look Like Renée Zellweger Pushed Against A Glass Window.

I Can't Wear Yellow Anymore. It's Too Matchy-matchy With My Catheter.