I Don't Have Hobbies; Hobbies Cost Money.

If God Had Intended Us Not To Masturbate, He Would Have Made Our Arms Shorter.

I Recently Bought A Book Of Free Verse. For Twelve Dollars.

Sometimes Guys'll Say To You, 'have A Good One'. I Say, 'i Already Have A Good One. Now I'm Looking For A Longer One'.

I Finally Accepted Jesus. Not As My Personal Savior, But As A Man I Intend To Borrow Money From.

If I Ever Lose My Mind I Hope Some Honest Person Will Find It And Take It To Lost And Found.