I Don't Have A Type, Really. But

People Are Surprised That I'm Nice And It Helps Me Out A Little Bit; It's Easy To Be Nice When Everyone Thinks You're Going To Be A Jerk But If People Think You're A Nice Guy Then It's Tough Because It's What They Expect.

My Girlfriend Is Upset About Her New Haircut. I Don't Understand Why She's Crying. I'm The One Who Has To Get A New Girlfriend.

Every Comic Went Through Their Mitch Hedberg Phase - The Glasses, The Hair In The Face - And You Knew Immediately When They Were Doing It.

Disgusting. I Just Found My Grandpa's Viagra. I Swear, I Almost Puked From Eating So Many.

Wayne Brady, I Don’t Understand Why People Keep Joking That You’re Not Black. Wayne Brady, You Are Black. After All, I Only Remember You For All The Years You Played An Uppity Slave On ‘who’s Line Is It Anyway?’.