I Caught My Wife In Bed With

I Got In A Fight One Time With A Really Big Guy, And He Said, "i'm Going To Mop The Floor With Your Face." I Said, "you'll Be Sorry." He Said, "oh, Yeah? Why?" I Said, "well, How Are You Going To Get Into The Corners?"

You Should Get Married. When I Was Younger, I Was Into The Fame And Fortune, And Now I Realize That A Loving Wife And Happy Children - That's Life's Greatest Consolation Prize.

Computers Aren't Intelligent, They Only Think They Are.

For Some Reason, Religious Jokes Seem As Trivial As Jokes About Food Or Driving.

I Think Fur Looks Better On An Animal Than On A Human Being. So I Dress My Dog In A Mink Teddy.