I Can't Relax And Sink Back In

It's Boring To Have The Same Guy Win. I'm Actively Rooting Against Myself.

We Regret The Insinuation That Mr. Alex Trebek Is A Robot, And Has Been Since 2004. Mr. Trebek's Robotic Frame Does Still Contain Some Organic Parts, Many Harvested From Patriotic Canadian Schoolchildren, So This Technically Makes Him A 'cyborg,' Not A 'robot.'

I Threw The Opening Pitch At A Blue Jays Game, And After The Pitch, The Mascot Asked Me If I Wanted Him To Sign The Game Ball, Which I Thought Was Funny. What Would He Write? "best Wishes, Some Guy In A Bird Suit"?"

I Would Read The Atlas For Pleasure. I Knew It Was Weird. It Was Weird.

I Always Feel A Certain Sense Of Reverence In Libraries, Even Small City Ones That Smell Like Homeless Internet Users.