I Can Get A Script And Go,

I’ve Always Had Dreams. When I Was Little, I’d Go To Sleep With My Head On My Hands, Which Were In Fists Like I Was Looking Through A Camera. I Felt Like Sleep Was The Movies - Just Drifting Off To The Movies.

You Can Be Hitler And Go To Confession And Say Forgive Me, Father, I Killed Six Million Jews, And The Priest Would Just Be Like No Problem. Say 10 Heil Marys. And Hitler Goes To Heaven.

If We Can Send A Person To The Moon, We Can Send Someone With Aids To The Moon, And Then Someday We Can Send Everybody With Aids To The Moon.

I Got Jury Duty And I Didn't Want To Go, So My Friend Said, "you Should Write Something Really Really Racist On The Form When You Return It. Like, You Should Put 'i Hate Chinks'." And I Said, "i'm Not Going To Put That On There Just To Get Out Of Jury Duty. I Don't Want People To Think That About Me." So Instead I Wrote, "i Love Chinks." And Who Doesn't?

I'm Lucky Because I Intentionally Keep My Overhead Low, And So I Can Say, "no, Thank You."