I Asked My Wife, 'is There Somebody

People Seldom Live Up To Their Baby Pictures.

I Was So Ugly My Mother Used To Feed Me With A Sling Shot.

For Christmas One Year I Bought My Son A Bb Gun. He Bought Me A T-shirt With A Bulls Eye On The Back.

Cars And Women Are A Lot Alike. They Lie About The Milage.

I Said To A Girl I'd Been Seeing, Come Home With Me, Honey, And I'll Show You Where It's At. She Said, You'd Better, Because The Last Time I Could'nt Find It.