I Admit, I Have A Tremendous Sex

Too Many Comics Today Ramble. By The Time They Get To The Punch Line, The Audience Has Either Gone To Sleep, Gone To The Bathroom Or Gone To Bed.

It Took Me Three Weeks To Stuff The Turkey. I Stuffed It Through The Beak.

My Father Used To Call Me The Laughing Hyena.

No Matter What Time Your Guests Arrive, Pretend They're Early, So Naturally You're Not Ready.

Most Children Threaten At Times To Run Away From Home. This Is The Only Thing That Keeps Some Parents Going.