Every Time I Go Near The Stove,

All I Ever Learned At My Mother's Knee Was What A Bony Knee Looked Like.

Old Age Is When The Liver Spots Show Through Your Gloves.

Never Go To Bed Mad. Stay Up And Fight.

Everybody Knows How Much Time Fang Spends In Bed. A Local Store That Gives A 30 Days' Trial On Mattresses Gives Fang Only 15 Days.

I'm Eighteen Years Behind In My Ironing.