Humor's A Weapon If You Want To

Cell Phones Have Gotten So Small, You Can't Tell Who's A Cell Phone User And Who's A Schizophrenic.

You Do A Clean Show And It's Over And The Audience Have Enjoyed Themselves And You've Enjoyed Yourself, And You Haven't Had To Resort To Shock.

Well I Was Much Too Practical To Presume To Have A Career In Comedy.

I've Been Told To Speed Up My Delivery When I Perform. But If I Lose The Stammer, I'm Just Another Slightly Amusing Accountant.

Sometimes You Forget You're Famous. You Wonder, Why Is That Person Staring At Me?