Humor Is Reason Gone Mad.

Military Intelligence Is A Contradiction In Terms.

I Was Married By A Judge. I Should Have Asked For A Jury.

Comedians Are A Much Rarer And Far More Valuable Commodity Than All The Gold And Precious Stones In The World.

Outside Of A Dog, A Book Is A Man's Best Friend. Inside Of A Dog It's Too Dark To Read.

When I Invite A Woman To Dinner, I Expect Her To Look At My Face. That's The Price She Has To Pay.