Hitler Was About Population Control.

Hitler Had The Right Idea. He Was Just An Underachiever.

Turning Water To Wine? I Mean C'mon, That's Stupid. They Should Have Let Me Write The Bible.

Every Time I See A Child Walking Down The Street I Like To Trip Them. While They Look For Their Missing Teeth, I Personally Remind Them That No Matter How Hard They Try I Will Always Be Better Than Them.

At First, I Didn't Really Care If Global Warming Existed. But Then I Realized It Means That Less Bums Would Freeze To Death In The Winter

I Mean, I Know Thousands Of People Died And Everything, But If It Happened Today, There's Just No Excuse. They'd Be Much Safer Inside A Movie Theater Watching One Of My Movies Instead Of Burning Alive In A Collapsing Skyscraper.