Having A Baby Dragged Me, Kicking And

As You Get Older You Realize Your Parents Don't Look So Dumb - And That You're Not As Smart As You Thought You Were.

When You're In @#*!#-ing Hell, Your Forehead Can Feel A Wee Bit Feverish. (by The Way, That's The Way My Wife Actually Curses. She Doesn't Use Dirty Words; She'll Literally Say "asterisk, Pound Sign, Exclamation Point, The-letter-'a'-with-a-circle-around-it, Asterisk, Asterisk, Asterisk.")

I Can't Get Past The Fact That Food Is Coming Out Of My Wife's Breasts. What Was Once Essentially An Entertainment Center Has Now Become A Juice Bar.

And In That Time, I Lost My Dad And Had Kids Of My Own. It Was Like, Ok, I Get It Now. I Know What Fatherhood Is All About. And You Look At Your Parents Differently

Just Because A Baby Cries, I Discovered, Doesn't Mean There's Always Something Wrong. Sometimes Babies Wake Up For No Real Reason. They Just Want To Check If They're Doing It Right. "this Is Sleeping, Right?" "exactly." "i Just Lie Here?" "that's Right." "okay." Then Back To Sleep They Go.