Having A Baby Can Be A Scream.

I Was The Last Girl In Larchmont, Ny To Get Married. My Mother Had A Sign Up: "last Girl Before Freeway."

Women Should Look Good. Work On Yourselves. Education? I Spit On Education. No Man Is Ever Going To Put His Hand Up Your Dress Looking For A Library Card.

I Have A Wonderful Psychiatrist That I See Maybe Once A Year, Because I Don't Need It. It All Comes Out Onstage.

I Wish I Could Tell You It Gets Better. It Doesn't Get Better. You Get Better.

I Was Not An Attractive Child. When I Didn't Use My Girl Scouts Uniform As A Uniform, I Used It As A Tent.