Every Time I Get On An Airplane

You Know You've Reached Middle Age When You're Cautioned To Slow Down By Your Doctor, Instead Of By The Police.

I'm Sure Some Of You Are Wondering Whether My Breasts Are Real. Let Me Just Explain To You. This One Is, This One Isn't.

And Since We're All Adults Here, Let's Be Brutally Honest-most Babies Are Not Actually Attractive. In Fact, They're Weird And Freakish Looking. A Large Percentage Of Them Are Squinty-eyed And Bald And Their Faces Are All Mushed Toegther, Kind Of Like Renee Zellweger Pushed Up Against A Glass Window.

If Two People Want To Get Married, Get Married! The Victorians Had A Great Saying: As Long As It Doesn't Scare The Horses, Do What You Want. And I Absolutely Believe That.

Welcome To My World! I've Been Through It All, And I Often Pinch Myself To Believe My Luck. I Design Jewlery, Create Cosmetics, Perform Comedy, Act, Lecture, Write Books, Travel, Have A Fabulous Daughter, And A Phenomenal Grandson-and I Feel I'm The Luckiest Woman On The Planet.