Don't Talk About Yourself So Much...we'll Do

I Am The World's Oldest Teenager. I've Never Lost My Youthful Attitude.

I Told My Kids, "someday, You'll Have Kids Of Your Own." One Of Them Said, "so Will You."

I'll Tell Ya, I Don't Get No Respect... The Other Day, I Got Back From A Business Trip. I Got In A Cab And Said To The Driver, "hey! Take Me To Where The Action Is!" So Ya Know Where He Took Me? He Took Me To My House!

I Drink Too Much. The Last Time I Gave A Urine Sample It Had An Olive In It.

She Was So Fat That Her Bathtub Has Stretch Marks.