Charlie Sheen Is To Stand-up What Larry

The Good Thing About A Jail Show Is Nobody Gets Up And Walks Out.

Comedians A Lot Of Times We're On The Road, We're By Our Self. We Come Home To New York To Our Empty One-bedroom Apartment, You Know, And We Need A Place To Go Where You See A Bunch Of Other Miserable People Sit Around And Eat A Corned Beef Sandwich.

Comics Just Don't Retire. They Either Die Young Or They Go To 100.

As Soon As You Start Analyzing Comedy Is When The World Starts To Fall Apart, And We're Second Guessing It. And We Are Way Too Sensitive.

I'm Pretty Careful About The Things I Say Ahead Of Time. I'm Thoughtful About Not Going Too Far. The Only Thing You Can Do Occasionally Is Be Too Much.