Cats Invented Self-esteem; There Is Not An

The Only Reason I Would Take Up Jogging Is So That I Could Hear Heavy Breathing Again.

Shopping Is A Woman Thing. It's A Contact Sport Like Football. Women Enjoy The Scrimmage, The Noisy Crowds, The Danger Of Being Trampled To Death, And The Ecstasy Of The Purchase.

My Son Would Walk To The Refrigerator-freezer And Fling Both Doors Open And Stand There Until The Hairs In His Nose Iced Up. After Surveying $200 Worth Of Food In Varying Shapes And Forms, He Would Declare Loudly, 'there's Nothing To Eat!'

Housework Is A Treadmill From Futility To Oblivion With Stop-offs At Tedium And Counter Productivity.

It's [motherhood] The Biggest On-the-job- Training Program In Existence Today.