Being Nuts Is Its Own Reward.

I Can't Have Cats Around Me Because They Try To Steal My Energy.

My Husband Says, 'roseanne, Don't You Think We Ought To Talk About Our Sexual Problems?' Like I'm Gonna Turn Off Wheel Of Fortune For That.

Once You Get Away From Wanting To Get Paid, You Can Actually Say Some True Things.

I Never Do Anything Fun, Because I'm A Housewife. I Hate That Word 'housewife.' I Prefer To Be Called 'domestic Goddess.'

Diets Are A Temporary Solution To A Permanent Problem.