An Abstainer Is The Sort Of Man

Women, As They Grow Older, Rely More And More On Cosmetics. Men, As They Grow Older, Rely More And More On A Sense Of Humor.

The Test Of A Real Comedian Is Whether You Laugh At Him Before He Opens His Mouth.

Patriotism Is Often An Arbitrary Veneration Of Real Estate Above Principles.

I Drink To Make Other People Interesting.

A Ready Way To Lose Your Friend Is To Lend Him Money. Another Equally Ready Way To Lose Him Is To Refuse To Lend Him Money. It Is Six Of One And A Half Dozen Of The Other.