Al Roker Said I Am 80 Years

I Was Getting Dressed And A Peeping Tom Looked In The Window, Took A Look And Pulled Down The Shade.

I Told My Mother-in-law That My House Was Her House, And She Said, 'get The Hell Off My Property.'

If You Can't Make Fun Of Yourself, You Don't Have Any Right To Make Fun Of Others

I Have A Million Dollar Figure ... But It's All Loose Change.

I Knew I Was An Unwanted Baby When I Saw That My Bath Toys Were A Toaster And A Radio.