Actually, I Comb My Hair Quite Often.

I Should Have Suspected My Husband Was Lazy. On Our Wedding Day, His Mother Told Me: "i'm Not Losing A Son; I'm Gaining A Couch."

It's Hard To Find A Negligee In My Size. I Wear A Junior Mister.

I'm The Only Woman Who Can Walk In Central Park At Night... And Reduce The Crime Rate.

If Your House Is Really A Mess And A Stranger Comes To The Door Greet Him With, 'who Could Have Done This? We Have No Enemies!'

I'd Love To Slit My Mother-in-law's Corsets And Watch Her Spread To Death.