Acting Is My True Love. I Would

I Hate Thin People; 'oh, Does The Tampon Make Me Look Fat?'

Two Is Company; Three Is Fifty Bucks.

Life Is Very Tough. If You Don't Laugh, It's Tough.

I Could Stop And Live Carefully But That's Ridiculous. I Don't Want To Live Carefully.

Every Comedian Is Furious. Age Makes Me Angry. I'm Unhappy At Not Being Able To Open Packages Anymore. I'm Angry That Libraries Have Gone. I Hate Children On Planes. I'm Very Shallow, So They Tend To Be Little Things. To Be Honest, I Think I Was Probably Angry The Day I Was Born, You Know, About Diapers Or Something.