Life Is Very Tough. If You Don't

My Body Is Dropping So Fast, My Gynecologist Wears A Hard Hat.

I Finally Found Out How Priests Get Holy Water. They Boil The Hell Out Of It.

I Said To My Husband, 'why Don't You Call Out My Name When We're Making Love?' He Said, 'i Don't Want To Wake You Up.'

[on Plastic Surgery:] My Motto Is: 'anything That Can Be Lifted Should Be Lifted. Anything That Falls Should Be Caught. And Try To Catch Any Falling Stuff Before It Hits The Ground.

Nothing Is Yours Permanently So You Better Enjoy It While It's Happening.