A Man Without A Woman Is Like

A Comic Should Suffer As Much Over A Single Line As A Man With A Hernia Would In Picking Up A Heavy Barbell.

It Was A Marriage Of Convenience, As My Father Had A Blister On His Big Toe And Couldn't Travel Far To Find A Girl.

Never Work With Animals Or Children.

I've Been Barbecued, Stewed, Screwed, Tattooed, And Fried By People Claiming To Be My Friends. The Human Race Has Gone Backward, Not Forward, Since The Days We Were Apes Swinging Through The Trees.

I Believe In Tying The Marriage Knot, As Long As It's Around The Woman's Neck