A Man Without A Woman Is Like

Some Things Are Better Than Sex, And Some Are Worse, But There's Nothing Exactly Like It.

My Illness Is Due To My Doctor's Insistence That I Drink Milk, A Whitish Fluid They Force Down Helpless Babies.

To Me, These Biblical Stories Are Just So Many Fish Stories, And I'm Not Specifically Referring To Jonah And The Whale. I Need Indisputable Proof Of Anything I'm Asked To Believe.

I Never Drink Water. I'm Afraid It Will Become Habit-forming.

I Was Married Once--in San Francisco. I Haven't Seen Her For Many Years. The Great Earthquake And Fire In 1906 Destroyed The Marriage Certificate. There's No Legal Proof. Which Proves That Earthquakes Aren't All Bad.