I Read That Mtv's Real World Got

If I Was A Mechanic And Someone Called Me And Said Their Car Would Not Start, I Would Say, "hey - Maybe A Killer Is After You!"

Every Time I Go And Shave, I Assume There's Someone Else On The Planet Shaving. So I Say, 'i'm Gonna Go Shave, Too.'

Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry For The Convenience.

When You're In Hollywood And You're A Comedian, Everybody Wants You To Do Other Things. All Right, You're A Stand-up Comedian, Can You Write Us A Script? That's Not Fair. That's Like If I Worked Hard To Become A Cook, And I'm A Really Good Cook, They'd Say, "ok, You're A Cook. Can You Farm?"

If You Have To Release Bad News To The Public, It Would Help If You Are Not Ugly.