You Know My Father's Favorite Game? Come

I Am Proud To Be An American. Because An American Can Eat Anything On The Face Of This Earth As Long As He Has Two Pieces Of Bread.

That Married Couples Can Live Together Day After Day Is A Miracle That The Vatican Has Overlooked.

I Was'nt Always Black. There Was This Freckel That Just Grew And Grew.

My Wife Was A Beautiful Woman Before We Had Children.

When You're A Father You Censor Yourself. You Get Just As Angry With A Child But You Don't Want To Say, "what The Filth And Foul And I'll Filth And Foul, Filth And Foul And, Yeah, Ya Filth And Foul Face, And I'll Filth And Foul, Foul, Filth!" You Don't Want To Say That To A Child So You Censor Yourself And You Sound Like An Idiot: "what The... Get Your... I'll Put A... Get Out Of My Face!"