You Know, I've Had A Helluva Life.

Marriage, As An Institution, Is As Dead As The Dodo Bird.

I Married First, Won The Oscar Before Olivia (sister Olivia De Havilland) Did, And If I Die First, She'll Undoubtedly Be Livid Because I Beat Her To It!

The Main Problem In Marriage Is That, For A Man, Sex Is A Hunger-like Eating. If The Man Is Hungry And Can't Get To A Fancy French Restaurant, He'll Go To A Hot Dog Stand. For A Woman, What's Important Is Love And Romance.

I Hope I'll Die On Stage At The Age At 105, Playing Peter Pan.

If You Keep Marrying As I Do, You Learn Everybody's Hobby.