You Can't Be Happy That Fire Cooks

I've Told Michael Jackson Jokes. If You Got Really Technical, You Could Say Those Are Jokes About Child Molestation. You Could, If You Got Technical. A Lot Of This Is Just Selective Outrage Because Honestly, The Audience Are The Ones That Tell Us That Something Shouldn't Be Spoken. The Audience Lets Us Know. And I've Never, In My Almost 30 Years Of Being A Comedian, Seen A Comedian Continue To Tell A Joke That The Audience Doesn't Respond To. I've Never Seen It.

Comedy Is The Blues For People Who Can’t Sing.

When You've Been On A Ghetto Diet Your Entire Life, You're Just Happy To Get A Large Soda Instead Of A Medium.

I'm Old Enough To Remember When There Were No Black Quarterbacks - There Were No Blacks On Tv. I Hope My Son Or Daughter Doesn't Have To Be As Fixated On Race As I Am, Because He Or She Will Grow Up In Freer Times.

Daddy Pays For The Water, Daddy Pays For The Gas, Daddy Pays For The Electricity, And If Daddy Didn't Pay For The Electricity, He'd Pay For The Candle On Your Nightstand, So You Can Study For The Big Test Tomorrow.