Where Does The Dentist Go When He

Let Me Get A Sip Of Water Here... You Figure This Stuff Is Safe To Drink? Actually, I Don't Care, I Drink It Anyway. You Know Why? Because I'm An American And I Expect A Little Cancer In My Food And Water. I'm A Loyal American And I'm Not Happy Unless I Let Government And Industry Poison Me A Little Bit Every Day.

As Much As I Love My Family, I Enjoy It When The House Is Empty, Because Then I Know I'm Truly Alone, As We All Are On The Planet, After All. Every Atom In Us Is Originally From A Star. And During My Moments Of Aloneness, I'm Most Mindful Of That; That I'm Just Another Group Of Matter Randomly But Wonderfully Arranged. That's When I Feel My Immortality.

When You Look At The Average American You Realize There's Nothing Nature Enjoys More Than A Good Joke.

I Think It Would Be Fair And Right To Use Some Of My Land And Wealth For A Drug-rehab Center Or An Indian School.

As You Swim The River Of Live, Do The Breast Stroke. It Helps To Clear The Turds From Your Path.